Ludwig opened the door. He was standing on Bernadette’s shoulders. This enabled him to open the door.
“We bought a coat, we bought a coat,” said Jane hurrying in with a large plastic bag under her arm
“We bought a coat,” repeated David, shutting the door *like it mattered*
“You mean you stole a coat you pair of fucking thieves,” said Ludwig, jumping down from Bernadette’s shoulders
“No Ludwig, It’s not like the computer,” said David, removing his knife from its ankle holster
“The computer, the coffee maker, the mattress...”
“They were deliveries.”
"Yeah, just not to us."
“Possession is nine tenths…”
“....Of the gore,” they shouted in unison and fell about laughing
“We're going out later,” said David, "Jane’s going to wear the coat to the pub."
Bernadette was not happy
“If you make me come," she said, "I will be forced to sell myself."
David knelt and stretched out a finger.
Ludwig jumped up and David lifted him onto the dining room table
“You really are a couple of pricks,” said Ludwig.
“You should have seen Oxford Street” said Jane, “so beautiful. Even the cranes looked lovely”
“Tell me about the cranes,” said Bernadette
“Like birds, their necks stretched upwards, singing to the sky”
“What did they sing?” Said Bernadette.” Her eye wide, her suction cups caressing the air.
“Shut up Bernadette for fucks sake,” said Ludwig.
“I'm coming to the pub,” he said, placing his wings on his hips
“No way,” said David, “not after last time.”
“Fuck you,” said Ludwig, “that was NOT my fault. That guy stood on me.”
“You pecked out his eye.”
“Accident”
“You told him you were going to do it”
“What evvvveeeerver”
David’s phone beeped.
“It’s a text, from Brian no.2,” he said.
"Oh god, not that wanker" said Ludwig
"Shush" said Jane, trying to squeeze herself beneath the sofa.
David read the message aloud
*The U4/e232 performs today. Anyone experiencing disintegration issues please contact ASAP. However please be aware, process 45vx is NOT covered under disappearance protocols and claims for reimbursement WILL be clouded as 'aggressive'. Good luck*
“They’ve shifted things forward,” said Jane, pulling on her forehead.
“We have to go,” she said, throwing the coat over her shoulders,
“Careful!” screamed David
“Aren't we going to the pub?” said Ludwig, “I want to get fucked up”
“No,” said Jane, “you'll have to get fucked up tomorrow.”
“I will alert the appropriate authorities” said Ludwig, saluting with his left wing
Jane walked toward the door. David followed, creating a cordon around her with his arms. He already hated the coat. One more mouth to feed he though
.....
GJ Hart currently lives in Brixton, London and has pieces published or cued in The Pygmy Giant, Spelk Fiction, Yellow Mama,
The squawk back, Flash Fiction Magazine and Unbroken Journal
